Adding SPICE to Your Marriage During the Month of Love


We all know February is the month of LOVE, right? 

You see it in all the stores, the red and pink hearts are everywhere.  You can’t escape the push from marketing companies to buy this or that to show your love.

Flower prices increase, jewelry or chocolate seems to be the things that MUST be bought to show our deepest appreciation for our loved ones.

Is that truth? 

I am not saying those things are bad.  They are wonderful and who doesn’t enjoy a bouquet of flowers!  I just received 2 dozen roses from my wonderful husband for our 14th wedding anniversary.  It was wonderful and I loved the gift.

But, does that REALLY show me he loves me?  It is a representation of his love, sure, but what he does on a daily basis is what really expresses his deep appreciation for me.

Last month, we challenged ourselves to take charge of our health, specifically our fertility health.  

The month of Love is a great month to evaluate how we are doing in the new year to add SPICE to our marriage. 

Remember, SPICE stands for Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Creative and Emotional.

Actions speak louder than words, right?

We can say over and over that we love our spouse, but love is truly understood through living it out in action on a daily basis.

And, what better month to challenge ourselves to improve in this area than the month of LOVE?

Here are a few simple, inexpensive things that can help add SPICE to your marriage:

  • Spiritual
    • Say a prayer of protection daily for your spouse.
    • Ask for his/her prayer intentions for the day.
  • Physical
    • Do a chore that is typically done by your spouse.
    • Serve them dinner or make their lunch for work.
  • Intellectual
    • Ask your spouse how their day was and really listen to the answer.
    • Spend some time each day discussing a topic your spouse is interested in.
  • Creative
    • Put a sticky note on the mirror each day telling your spouse why you love them.
    • Write a love letter to your spouse.
  • Emotional
    • Greet your spouse with a hug and kiss each time they leave and come home for the day.
    • Plan a date night, either at home or out.  If at home, make sure there are no interruptions.  Put the phone, computer and kids to bed.

Showing your love and appreciation for your spouse does not need to include fancy, expensive things. 

For me, the little things that are done from the heart by my husband are what mean the most to me.  The little expressions of love such as carting the kids to their multiple activities so it is one less thing for me to do or doing a load of laundry and putting the clothes away mean so much. 

When he says he loves me and gives me a hug when he can tell I am having a bad day makes my heart smile.  The flowers and gifts are nice but these are the moments and actions I remember most. 

You may say: that is great for you, but that would never work in my marriage or I never receive that kind of love.

The Choice is Yours. 

Choose to be the one to make the difference and make the change.  Be the example of love in action.  It may not always be easy and your spouse may sometimes not make it easy.

But, we are called to live out love in action, regardless of our feelings and regardless of how we are being treated that day. 

This month may have been hijacked by the “Hallmark” industry in order to sell more candy, flowers, chocolate and jewelry, but we don’t have to walk away with scorn.

Instead, we can take it as an opportunity to find some simple ways to bring some LOVE to our spouse and SPICE up our marriage.